We need to talk
Yesterday, a neighbour and a friend collapsed while playing badminton. His partners took him to the hospital, but he had already passed away, seemingly, on the court. There were no warning signs, nothing unusual about his energy on the court. He was seemingly in good health and a physically active person. I’ve cursorily known him and his family for years now. The kind that fit the description of unassuming folks, generally happy, and whom you would always spot at community events.
Life always has been fickle, but we keep forgetting that.
When sudden death happens to folks around us, we introspect. What would we do? What could have been the cause? We think of the family that has been dealt a blow out of the blue. And we move on.
My father is a regular at his gym. In between his lifting weights, he likes to converse. Most gym attendees are at least 20 years younger to him. My generation and younger.
His observation is that even in the morning most have a serious face. Over small talk, he infers that they’re always thinking. Of the career move. The business deals. Kids’ classes and routines. Family occasions. The next holiday. Budget. Investments. Stock Market. Thoughts of dreams and goals.
Man is truly the thinking animal. Like cows, we are constantly chewing, ruminating. There is one difference he spots between generations.
We are speaking less.
His generation was the counsel-seeking generation. Thoughts were validated by speaking to friends, family, elders. Speaking out lessens the load. We are trying to connect more with the artificial side of intelligence. His generation always prefers the human side of it.
Their circle of authenticity feels larger. We all have an inner circle - the folks we are truly honest with. I believe the circle size is shrinking over generations. It’ll be a good dataset to study.
Frank conversations help even when they feel difficult. They center us. Or ground us.
The energy being generated by our thoughts and goals needs dissipation. I am currently traveling and, in my hotel, have seen a diversity of age groups. The digital ages (5+) are device driven. The elders (60+) seem to dissipate the energy by talking.
I don’t think just talking will help extend lives. Maybe it will enrich our experiences.
If thinking is the yin, talking is the yang.
I’ll try to have that balance.
That’s it for today.
Hemang.